I am Mae German. 34 years old. Born in Mangatarem, province of Pangasinan. I was taught and trained by 
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In a Relationship No Man Should Live Alone
In a Relationship No Man Should Live Alone | No Man Should Live Alone |
| Thursday, 28 July 2011 | |
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When C asked me on Sunday afternoon, "Magsisimba tayo mamaya di ba?" (We're going to hear mass later, right?), I was shocked. I was so used to hearing the anticipated mass on Saturdays that I thought we already went to church the day before. Rewind. On Saturday, since I did not play badminton, I went to Michael's Arts and Crafts to shop for some cardstocks, papers, and some more stuffs that were on sale. It took me over two hours to do that, making sure I am getting the right stuff and my money's worth. Then I went to King Kullen to buy groceries. When I got home, I had late lunch; then I cooked. J came at around 5 in the afternoon. He wanted to watch a movie. There was no Transformers at the cinema near us so the three of us ended up watching Captain America. At 9 in the evening we caught S just before he hopped in the bus going to the apartment. C and I wanted to watch the second part of Harry Potter 7 with him because it were the three of us who watched the first part. So yes, we watched another movie that night. Call it movie marathon. And that was Saturday. And as I said I totally forgot about hearing the mass for this week because I thought we did already. When C asked me I told him, yes, we're hearing the mass after work. Silently I thanked God for giving me a partner like C. And silently I said to myself, every man should have a partner. May be not in life but in their walk in Faith. So when one forgets about his/her obligation (like I did on Sunday), the other one may remind. I have prayed for C. I am still praying for him every single day. And every time, I thank God for him. He has become my partner in Christ. Now here's a little testimony: C and his family are Roman Catholic but I have learned that they weren't brought up practicing their Faith. Probably like any other RCs, they only go to church on Christmases or maybe never at all. But they are RCs. C courted me in my own terms, as I have blogged about in the past-- 9 Masses together. It took time but he did it-- we made it. Then my sentiment was I wish(ed) I could get him to hear mass with me every Sunday-- the rest of our lives together. It did not happen in one click. There were Sundays that I hear mass alone-- those Sundays hurt. But again, I prayed harder each time I am hurting. I even lit candles for him every Sunday that he wasn't with me. I love this man but if I cannot share my Faith with him, it will be useless to go on. I do not want to end up with someone who's just going to give me a heartache every time I hear mass alone. And definitely, I cannot live with someone who doesn't have the same Faith as I have. Then God, once again, listened to my prayer. Now we have been hearing mass together every week (I cannot remember the last time that I heard mass alone). And it makes me want to cry writing that line. God is listening to us. God is working in us. God is working on us. On Sundays, hearing mass is my priority. And hopefully, maybe even if I have my own family, it will remain on top of my priority. And if it couldn't be helped because of work, then it will still be a priority for the the whole week. There was a priest who told me that God understands when one cannot hear the anticipated mass on Saturday or on Sunday itself, as long as we make sure that we hear mass once a week. It's an obligation. In our case, we are lucky to have a church nearby that we can run to after our work on Saturday or Sunday (well, running would mean a 30-minute walk; the bus takes us there in 5 minutes). Some people at work would even support us when we decide to hear the anticipated mass, since that would mean leaving 15 minutes earlier from work because we need to catch the bus to get to the 5PM mass. There's even one Jewish veterinarian who calls himself our "church bus" because on Sundays that he is on duty, he's always happy to give us a ride to the church, which is, on his way. It is not hard going to St. Mary's Church here but God would still make some ways to make it more fun for us. That's cool. Then a question popped up in my head one time: Why do we have to hear mass, anyway? [And often I am asked why bad people would still go to mass when they are, well, bad? (Nagsisimba pa eh ang sama-sama naman) Mas dapat nga sila ang magsimba, di ba? Don't you think they need that more than anybody else needs it?] I have had three answers for that. One: is because it is our obligation as a Christian. Two: because we "need" to feed our soul with His words through the Eucharist. Three: we owe it to God-- that 1 hour that He's asking from us in return for that 168 hours that He's giving us in a week. (Is my Math correct?) Now here's another testimony: Growing up, as I was forced to attend Catechism(s) or what some call now as Sunday schooling, I was forced to hear mass on a day of obligation (Sundays, Holy week, Midnight masses, etc). I detested those days. I didn't like hearing the mass. It was boring for me. I didn't know why I had to hear mass except that "it is an obligation". Who wants obligation, anyway? But life has taught me and honed my Faith. I changed when I started working many years ago. It wasn't because I felt life was being unfair to me and I needed a back up, rather, it was more of having a good life despite the bad. God has been (and is) always good to me, why would I not give back? Now I feel bad whenever I miss hearing the mass. And you could say how bad I would have felt if I missed hearing the mass last Sunday (God! Really, THANK YOU for C who reminded me. Bless him!). I know for sure that C is only hearing masses because of me. Like what I have said, he wasn't brought up the same way as I was brought up. But I believe, like God is (still) working on me, He is continuously working on him. And I love that thought that God is working on both us as a couple in terms of Faith. I am assured He won't let go of us. There was one time that a priest made C and I realized something about our feelings on hearing mass on Sundays. He talked about the "yoke". The gospel came from Matthew 11: 28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.C asked me what a yoke is and I said something like, "it's like a burden, too"... Wow! You see that? You see how I look(ed) at whatever God is offering me-- a BURDEN! I called it a burden. God must have heard me because during the homily, when we both thought the priest was boring (and we're both trying to stay awake), he mentioned something about the yoke, which is a crossbar that we see on a cow's neck or usually on two cows when they plow the field together, by the way. He said something like this: We hear the mass every Sunday because it is a law [in our faith]. And most often than not, laws are hard to follow. What about thinking that we hear the mass because we need to receive and carry God's yoke in order to survive the hardships of life? All these times I was thinking that these yokes were uncomfortable. But the truth is (now I know), yokes, should be (exactly) fitted on the cows who are going to wear them to help them. If it's loose, it's not good. The same thing when it is tightly fitted. Yokes would make the work of a pair of oxen easier. Anyone who is carrying anything heavy, if given a yoke, would make any burden lighter. And God's yoke, we can be sure, is well-fitted for each of us, individually. And if we see hearing masses as "uncomfortable" or a "burden" then it's because we're looking at it the wrong way, as I was looking at it in the past. It's a yoke. We need to take it if we want a lighter load. Our loads may not be lessened but I am sure, it will feel lighter. It's what a yoke is for. And that is what the Eucharist is for-- that and for many more reasons. I am not preaching. Not all of us have partners who are willing to join us on our journey in our Faith. I understand that sometimes to avoid conflict one has to give in to the other. Always, my advice is, PRAY EVERY SINGLE DAY for impossible things to happen. Believe me when I say, He will make it happen. C and I have been hearing mass together every Sunday now. My only prayer now is that when God calls my name before him, he would still go to church and hear mass on Sundays. I would still be watching over him like he's watching over me. |
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