I am Mae German. 34 years old. Born in Mangatarem, province of Pangasinan. I was taught and trained by 
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In a Relationship Bless Us, Oh Lord.
In a Relationship Bless Us, Oh Lord. | Bless Us, Oh Lord. |
| Thursday, 17 November 2011 | |
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God, Marry Us-- When I say this line in my prayers, I would feel the tears building up in my eyes; my heart so heavy that it feels like it's about to burst. Like right now. God, marry us. Me and my boyfriend are living-in one roof. We're Christians. We're Roman Catholics. With that being said, I am sure you get the point. If not, here's some more... Some of us are religious; some, spiritual; some are maybe in between. We all believe in something. C and I, we are not perfect but we strive to do things right (the things that we feel is right, that is). We are happy. We do good things together. Fun things. We feel that we're growing together as Christians. We read a Bible together, we pray together, and we go to church together. We're both working hard for our future-- hoping that that future is with God in our center. But how can we say that when we're bypassing one or two of the Sacraments? What we're doing is not enough to be worthy of God's love even when they say His love is unconditional (well, maybe that is just my own thinking). Truth is, we're aware of our situation. Sad to say, right now we feel that we're helpless in this case. Why?-- Because the government has given us limitations. That hurts. The word "limitation" hurts. I feel hopeless, helpless. Frustrated. Why are we being stopped when what we want to do is to make things right? We want that Sacrament of Marriage. God knows we are aching to have that. Some girls they dream of their weddings and huge and beautiful engagement rings since they were little. Maybe I had those dreams, too. But you know, my prayers have changed and it has changed me. I am not after the big weddings now and engagement rings (or any platinum or titanium partnership rings) are but secondary or may not exist at all. I cannot bring that to Heaven or I should say, that cannot bring me to Heaven. I don't even care if we throw a party or do the traditional wedding celebration. All I want is for the church to welcome our union and hug us. That is my piece of Heaven on earth. We just want our union to be right in the eyes of God. We just want the church to bless us. We just want to go inside the church without this pain and longing in our hearts-- God have mercy on us. God, please marry us despite our shortcomings; God, please marry us. There I said it. I did my research online to check the requirements for church weddings and sadly we can't provide the church some of the requirements. That brought my world down. One Sunday, a priest at St. Mary's Church mentioned something about couples living-in together and that he can do something about it. I am not sure what he meant by "he'll do something about it" but it almost felt like a miracle to us. We felt there's hope. Maybe he can give us the Sacrament. Will he marry us? Will he bless us? Is the Sacrament of Marriage only for the chosen ones? Is it a privilege not everyone is entitled of? Don't we have the right to have that sacrament, too, wherever, whenever? Every time we hear the mass, I am praying he'll be the presiding priest. He hits something in us every time he says the homily. Something that seems to be pushing us to try harder-- MAKE THINGS RIGHT. Two Sundays ago, before the mass started, C and I were talking about going to confession. That day, during the homily, that same priest talked about going to confession regularly. Is he a mind-reader? He's my idol. And if there's one priest that I'd like to marry us, it is him. Because he talks about the truth and the reality of life in simple but straightforward words. Sometimes they cut like a sword. His words are (for me) encouraging-- MAKE THINGS RIGHT. I grabbed my copy of the bulletin to see if he has an email address. At least I could explain our side better in writing, I thought. But there's none. God, please do something. Please work on something. I need a miracle. Holy Spirit, please move me, push me to do something. Holy Spirit, I need You. Again, I prayed. I went home with a heavy heart that Sunday. There he was, standing by the door, saying goodbye to the people. I did nothing. On Monday, I checked their website. God heard my prayer. There it was, an email address. So I sent him my plea. Now he wants to meet us. In this new age, in this generation, some people would accept couples like us. We are grateful for that. But at the end of the day, we know what really matters is how one accepts her/himself. I am restless. Why wait for the next day or the next week or the next month or the next year to start living right? What if something happens today? What if we die today? How are we going to explain ourselves to God when He asks us why we kept doing what we're doing when we're aware of that "right thing" to do? But life has given us no choice. Hmmm... how about flying to Las Vegas? Kidding. Of course I am not talking about that kind of union. We're not getting married for the sake of getting married. If we're doing it, I could say, we are doing not just because we love each other but because we love God, dearly. Join us in our prayer. |
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