I asked my friend what were his plans and he told me he has none. He has prayers instead of plans...and that I agree with him. For during those times I was so low and I was asking myself so many questions on what my future will be (during the BOX-OF-CHOCOLATE-days), I learned to let go of my plans and my dreams. I learned to pray, let go and let God.

 
What happens when we plan is that there is a tendency for us to disappoint other people... and ourselves. Believe me, I have done so much planning in my life, I have set goals, I have dreamed too much, and it was only later on that I realized that I was the main person responsible for all the heartaches, disappointments, and depressions I went through all my 24 years in this planet.   

 
I told myself I'd stop planning for my future. I'll live one day at a time, acknowledge defeat and depression and set my mind to forget it the next day (yes, Tin, if God wakes me up again for another day). I told myself I'd stop deciding and let God give me His decisions, instead. Of course I still have to decide for practical purposes like what should I wear or what should I eat or what should I give. It doesn't mean that I would just sit on a couch and wait for what God wants me to do the next second. What for that He created me and given me the free-will, right? I'm speaking about my future here. You know... the sit-on-a-rocking-chair-with-all-my-silver-locks-thing? With whoever-the-guy-I-would-end-up-being-married-for-the-rest-of-my-life? The how-much-money-I-earn-and-what-kind-of-life-I-could-have-thing? The future... get it?

I have ran through the question: WHAT IS THE MOST IRRITATING QUESTION YOU'VE BEEN ASKED MANY TIMES? Oh well, I could answer that and I would even give you three (or four) answers for that. First, I have been asked, many times, the question, Anong plano mo sa buhay mo? (and the question, Ganyan na lang ba ang buhay mo? comes running after that). Second, the question, Kailan ka aalis patungong ibang bansa? (subText: Mas malaki ang kita mo dun..blah-blah-blah). Third, the question, Kailan ang kasal?. ARRGGHHH!!!! 

You see, it doesn't irritate me whenever people ask me what my plans for my life are and when do I leave for abroad. But it irritates me whenever I start thinking about why people ask me such questions. They think my life is hopeless here and I am starting to think it is indeed hopeless. I am starting to think that my life indeed is stagnant. And it is. Yes, it is. 

I used to think about the future really hard. But then I stopped. It doesn't mean that I stopped dreaming and wishing on stars at night. I just learned something better than that. I learned to pray for God's will (THY WILL BE DONE). You see when it's too cloudy and we can't see blue skies above, we tend to give up. But what we don't know is that God is preparing something for us. Something. Big or small. It's something that we have to work on and pray for to be able to see it clearly. 

God answers every prayer we ask. Yes, No, Wait. Three ways.

And one day, all those questions thrown at me will be answered. IN HIS TIME. In His perfect time.